so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
