So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
