So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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