As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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