i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
The air taste purple.
Randomize
