I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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