I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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