New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
