i need an iv and a liver transplant
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
