I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
