Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm too high and old for this...
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