my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
you inspire me to be a worse person
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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