There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Randomize
