how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
