it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
