i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
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