You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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