I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
