Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Randomize
