Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
