these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Randomize
