no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
