Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
