there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
