Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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