Hey man sorry I got all grabby
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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