Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
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