it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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