everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize