I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm both gender and math confused
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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