bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
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