let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize