I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
he had hair everywhere except his balls
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
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