SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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