My nipple is on Facebook.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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