I'm pants shitting drunk right now
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
