Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
