I'm drive I can fine osifer
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
