Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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