Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Randomize
