I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
