My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
