whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
