would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
