If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
