addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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