So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
