I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
