Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
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