It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
