it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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