If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
